Philophobia (Fear of Love)
The fear of Love may be the result of negative experiences in the past or it may have been learnt from a parent or caregiver during earlier developmental years.
The unique meanings that people attribute to life experiences depends on a wide range of psychological, socio-economic and cultural beliefs each influencing the types of coping strategies that people develop.
There is no scientific evidence that Philophobia is the result of any kind of biological fault or chemical imbalance in spite of the traction that these biomedical models of mental illness are given in the media.
On the contrary, Philophobia is much more likely to be the result of the sufferers subjective evaluation of what happened to them in the past and is therefore a psychosocial phenomenon.
Philophobia Symptoms & Behaviours
The symptoms of Philophobia are very similar to other specific phobias and often include the following feelings or behaviours:
- Panic attacks.
- Avoidance of situations related to Love.
- Safety behaviours designed to minimise exposure to Love.
- Low self esteem.
Within the Power Threat Meaning Framework, the symptoms of Philophobia may be better thought of as threat responses and coping strategies that sufferers adopt in order to cope with the immediate problem.
Unfortunately, when faced a Fear of Love, many people fail to use threat responses that are adaptive and choose behaviours that end up being more harmful to mental health in the longer term.
Despite this paradox, it is important to recognise that nobody deliberately chooses maladaptive coping mechanisms that result in more harm than good.
The reason for this is that at some level, the choice of threat response made complete sense at the time the threat was originally experienced which may have been in childhood when less mental resources were available.
Maladaptive Coping Mechanisms in Philophobia
A common problem Philophobia sufferers have is that their coping strategies may no longer be relevant in the current context or time in which they live.
Unfortunately, human beings have a built in tendency to repeat behaviours that are supposed to provide benefits without questioning whether or not they still make sense.
We call these behaviours habits which require very little conscious activation as they are generally performed automatically at a sub-conscious level.
Habitual coping strategies and threat responses that are no longer coherent in the current context are known as post coherent adaptations and are, invariably, the main cause of the emotional distress being experienced at the present time.
Psychosocial Therapy for Philophobia
We offer a range of psychotherapy options for Philophobia all of which adopt a psychosocial perspective.
Psychosocial therapy sets out to solve your Fear of Love from the point of view of what has happened to you and NOT what is wrong with you.
This approach adopts the British Psychological Society’s Power Threat Meaning Framework which rejects the idea that emotional distress is an illness.
This perspective stands in stark contrast to the biomedical models of mental illness used widely throughout the psychiatric and medical communities.
These psychosocial approaches to Philophobia are supported by clinical and empirical evidence established over the last 20 years.
CORE CBT for Philophobia
It is particularly well-suited to anxiety related problems like Philophobia because of the significance of cognitive distortions in the creation of phobic responses.
It is a 10 module course normally taken over a 10 week period with weekly hour long counselling sessions in our offices or online with Zoom.
The CORE programme can also be followed as a teach yourself CBT course for those with more manageable levels of anxiety.
FREE Initial Consultations
If you’d like to find out more about overcoming or recovering from Philophobia or the Fear of Love then why not arrange a free initial consultation with us.
During this consultation we will discuss your particular problems and the potential solutions in a safe and confidential environment without you having to commit to any counselling programmes or sessions going forward.
It is our view that not only do you need to decide whether the Lee Psychology approach suits who you are and what you have been through, but also whether or not you feel you will be able to work effectively with us as individuals.