All About a Loss of Interest in Sex and How to Overcome it with Psychological Therapy & Counselling

What is a Loss of Interest in Sex?

A loss of interest in sex is also known as a loss of libido or having a low sex-drive.

It is estimated that 1 in 5 couples will experience this at least once in their lifetimes.

Experts agree that one of the main reasons of this loss of interest is sex is the hectic pace of modern life.

With more money worries and a higher incidence of stress & anxiety problems it seems hardly surprising that our sexual libidos are affected.

During the early stages of a relationship it can seem like we can’t get enough sex but as life goes on and our relationships mature these feelings of desire can ebb naturally.

For couples who are not aware of this fact it can be incorrectly interpreted as meaning that something is wrong in the relationship or that one partner “loves the other less than before”.

Problems that can lead to a loss of interest in sex

People of all genders can experience a loss of interest in sex and it is important not to associate this loss of libido with “personal attractiveness” which unfortunately is all too often what happens.

There are a number of problems that have been clearly identified as having a negative impact on our level of interest in sex and although the list below is not exhaustive, it does cover the main factors affecting libido:

Erectile Dysfunction

Although it may seem very obvious, when Erectile Dysfunction strikes it can sometimes make a man feel so “inadequate” that he avoids sex altogether.

Relationship Problems

If there are some underlying troubles within the relationship that remain unspoken or simply are not being dealt with then this can have a negative impact on your interest is sex.

Sometimes it can be relatively minor irritations such as a partner’s lack of personal hygiene, feelings that one partner is working harder than the other or that one has become lazy.

These problems can generally be fairly easily dealt with through improved communication, perhaps by seeking help for improved self-confidence.

Stress

Any Stress in your life can produce this negative effect on your sex life.

Stress can be present at work, from money problems, due to the loss of a loved one, a new job, an impending presentation at which you might have to speak publicly or many other factors.

Stress can easily result in a loss of interest in sex.

Low Self-Esteem

If you have developed a low opinion of yourself and don’t feel like you are a valuable person then it can often be difficult to believe that you could be sexually attractive to another person.

Under these circumstances your mind can modify this low self esteem into a lowering of sexual desire

Depression

Depression can have a major impact on your interest in sex.

When we become withdrawn from those around us our minds can move into a “survival” mode during which all sexual desire diminishes.

Alcohol and Drug Abuse

Drug or alcohol use can become a primary focus for those people unable to contain their “addictive behaviour”.

When these become the primary focus in life they can lead to less and less time thinking about sex, or to that matter, anything else.

Drug and Alcohol abuse can disguise an underlying personality problem which may in itself be a cause of worry when trying to communicate or attract a new partner.

People may get drunk before building up the “courage” to ask somebody out on a date and alcohol, in fact, reduces Libido.

Medication

A loss of interest in sex is also one of the known side-effects of anti-depressants and some other prescription drugs.

Therapy & Counselling for A loss of interest in sex

We offer a number of different types of therapy and counselling for a loss of interest in sex and low libido problems.

Choosing the most suitable therapy depends on a number of different considerations including factors such as:

• How long you have had the problem.
• Your personal preferences.
• How your problem is affecting you today.

You can read more about the different types of therapy for a low libido on the following links:

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for A loss of interest in sex
• Counselling for A loss of interest in sex
• Pluralistic Therapy for Low Libido

Although all therapies use slightly different approaches, the one thing they all have in common is the relationship that is formed between the client and therapist.

Research suggests that this therapy relationship may be the most important factor in achieving a good therapy outcome.

Behaviour Change Framework – BCF

All of our counselling sessions and programmes are enhanced by applying the Behaviour Change Framework (BCF).

This scientifically proven protocol clearly defines the incremental stages of behaviour change that you need to go through in order to achieve long lasting and sustainable change.

Drawn from the Transtheoretical Model of Behaviour Change (TTM), the framework provides a roadmap that not only gauges the current stage of progression through the change process, but also indicates if more change is required before entering the next phase of therapy or coaching.

In this way, we are able to ensure that you get the best possible level of support in overcoming your problems as well as ensuring that we don’t terminate the change process prematurely.

You can read more about the Science of Change here.

Arrange your FREE initial consultation here.

If you’d like to find out more about overcoming a loss of interest in sex or recovering from any of your mental health problems then why not arrange a free initial consultation with us.

During this consultation we will discuss your particular issues and the different types of mental health counselling we offer (including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – CBT) without you having to commit to any counselling going forward.

The consultation lasts around 50 minutes and is a great opportunity to meet with either Paul or Joan and decide if you would like to proceed with any support.